


Too Hot Not To Happen

by von_gelmini



Category: Doctor Who, Doctor Who (1963), Doctor Who (2005)
Genre: (depending on if you read Fivey's willingness to be genuine or bargained), Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Anal Sex, Dom/sub, Dubious Consent, Gang Bang, M/M, Post Episode AU: s03e13 Last of the Time Lords, The great LJ migration 2k16, Timey-Wimey, Voyeurism
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-02-26
Updated: 2016-02-26
Packaged: 2018-05-23 09:10:20
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,409
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6111778
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/von_gelmini/pseuds/von_gelmini
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Typical canon divergent D/M AU beginnings. The Master isn't shot at the end of TLOTTL. He and the Doctor take off together.</p><p>The Master gets bored and arranges a little vacation with himself.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Too Hot Not To Happen

**Author's Note:**

> Originally published on LJ, January 30, 2011.

"What are you doing?"

"Texting. I'd think that was obvious," the Master replied.

"Yes, but to whom are you texting? I'm here and there isn't anyone else in the universe who'd put up with you."

"I put up with me."

The Doctor was confused but then it dawned on him. "You can't! You can't text YOURSELF!" 

"Oh rubbish. The universe won't implode."

"And you know that how?"

"Because it hasn't so far any of the other times I've done it."

"You've… you've…"

"There, there. Keep trying. You'll get the hang of talking one of these days."

"You CAN'T!"

The Master pressed the 'send' button. "Just did." He grinned and went to the other side of the TARDIS console and began to press buttons and turn dials. "Now. _This_ is so much more fun since you took those bloody isomorphic controls off."

"I WHAT?"

"Oops. I mean since _I_ took those bloody isomorphic controls off."

The Doctor groaned. "I hate you."

 

The Master grinned and bounded over to him, giving him a peck on the cheek before adjusting more dials. "No you don't. You lurrrrvvveee me. You told me so, remember."

The Doctor sat on the jump seat, pinched his nose between his fingers and shook his head. "Where are we going."

"Oh you'll like this. You said we needed some fun. A vacation, you said. No running or monsters or saving the day."

"Yes..." the Doctor said skeptically. He remembered the conversation just fine. He simply doubted that the Master's plan wouldn't eventually involve something of the sort.

"A nice little vacation planet. A _pleasure_ planet," the Master said leering. "Just you and me… and you and me… and maybe you and me if all the youngsters can manage to make it. There's that whole problem with his, your, TARDIS being locked to Earth or something like that."

"YOU CAN'T!" The Doctor leapt up from his seat and frantically examined the TARDIS's settings. 

"Blah, blah, blah. You're just afraid you'll lose the bet."

"What bet?"

“Oh come on. The idea is simply too hot not to happen at some point in our life.”

“What. Bet.”

"That my you is better than his you."

The Doctor buried his face in his hands, then slowly opened his fingers to peek through, his eyebrows raised. "You don't mean… You know I can't touch another version of myself. Well, I did that one time, but that nearly blew a hole the size of Belgium in the Earth. And you can't touch a different version of me, I mean I don't _think_ you can because I'd remember it and I _don't_ remember it."

"Oh don't be such a worrywart. You'll give yourself a headache and that's no fun where we're going."

 

"If the universe implodes it'll all be your fault."

"And I'm sure you'll remind me of that while we're busy imploding, you sanctimonious prat. You're just afraid you'll have fun."

"I doubt it."

"I _know_ it." The Master gave him a lecherous grin. "I know you too well, my little Theete. And while his you is still you, you're much more… sensual… in this incarnation."

"As opposed to which? My sixth? That wouldn't take much!"

"No, no, pet. One off. Your fifth. You remember, the pretty blonde boy I used to delight so much in making scream?" The Master caressed the Doctor's blushing cheek. "Who do _you_ think will win? You or you?"

"Win what?"

"Who can get fucked the most." The Master smiled. "Judging from the past few months since you've decided to be my keeper, I think you'll win hands down… or arse up as the case may be." He leaned in and whispered, his breath hot on the Doctor's ear. "And I've had the advantage of having had you both. The other me, well, he's just guessing."

"You cannot be serious."

"As a heart attack, my pretty."

"What makes you think I'll go along with this? Or were you just planning on having me raped?"

The Master rolled his eyes. "I thought we were past all that. You know you want it." He stepped closer, nudging the Doctor's knees apart as he sat on the seat. "All those hot men lusting after your gorgeous skinny arse. Pricks all hard for you." He reached down and rubbed the Doctor through his pin-striped trousers. "Me sitting there watching them plow your arse, watching you get hard for them, watching them make you come over and over again, watching you beg them to fuck you harder. You know you want it. You'll do anything for me. It'll make me so hot seeing that." He licked along the Doctor's throat, grinding their bodies together. "When you're so shagged out you can't move, when your arse is so loose and wet and full of come you think you can't even feel it anymore... that's when I'll show you that you can." He squeezed the Doctor's cock just a little too tightly, making him moan. "I know I can always make you scream for me."

"It's hardly fair, I'm a lot younger then…"

"And still horny as a bitch on heat, if I remember correctly." He grinned. "And I do remember quite correctly." He felt the Doctor's arms slip around his waist. "You were always so willing in that body."

"Hardly," the Doctor said. "You just always took what you wanted."

"Oh and you put up just enough of a struggle to appease your conscience, as you always did. But we're past all that now, aren't we?"

The Doctor groaned and buried his face in the Master's neck. "Yes."

"Good. Because if we're not, I mean if this is all too much for you…"

"No."

"I told you, I'd stay. Not as your pet but as your lover. Your _willing_ lover. Stop being that and I'll leave."

"You don't have to," the Doctor said. "I want you."

"Good. I want you too."

"So let's go to the bedroom."

"This will be more fun."

"The universe will…"

"I know, I know! Isn't that part of the fun though? Will it or won't it? Can the universe stand up to the combined passions of two completely shagged out Doctors or will it tear itself apart from the sheer amount of orgasmic energy?"

"And the fact that we're crossing one another's time lines and creating a paradox…"

"Pair of Docs… exactly!" He grinned again. "Or trio if I can manage to get your third's TARDIS working again."

"You won't because you didn't." 

"Or maybe I will because I did?" He jumped back and spread his arms. "Who knows? You've got to admit, it is brilliant, isn't it?"

"You're a bloody lunatic," the Doctor said, but he smiled.

"Yep. And that's the fun of me, isn't it!"

The Doctor laughed. "One of these days, Koschei, you're going to go too far."

"And don't you just love the excitement? Whatever did you do with your boring old self without me in your life?"

The Doctor got up and walked over to the console. "I have no idea how I ever managed," he said dryly. He made a few adjustments to their course and to the settings that should allow the paradox to not rip the worlds apart (he hoped!).

"You'll do it!" The Master clapped his hands together. "I knew you would."

"But will I, I mean he?"

The Master rolled his eyes. "Trust me. I remember you better than you do. You were a lot easier to manipulate then than you are even now."

"I was not," he said petulantly. The TARDIS's rotor stopped. "We're here. And judging from these warnings, so are two other TARDISes." The Doctor frowned. "What about the Blinovitch effect?"

"Quit worrying. All taken care of by my other me. Ugh. I don't want to watch some old paunchy you getting fucked."

"How shallow of you, Master. I've seen you in worse shape."

"Oh yeah, you so were ready to jump my crispy bones because you're not at all shallow or concerned with what I looked like."

The Doctor looked ashamed. "Okay, so we're both shallow," he admitted.

"Exactly!" The Master put his arm around the Doctor's waist. "More alike than not, I've always told you that."

"I am not like you."

"Well, there _are_ significant differences… For instance, I'm not about to be fucked within an inch of my life and love every minute of it."

"You…" The insult sputtered on the Doctor's lips because, well, it was true. "He doesn't stand a chance," the Doctor said with a sly grin.

"That's the spirit!" The Master patted him on his bum as he headed down the ramp to the door.

"Doctor."

"Doctor."

"Master."

"Yes, now we all bloody well know who we are," the Master said frowning at himself and the two Doctors. "You." The blonde Doctor pointed at himself. "Yes you. You're here willingly?"

"What do you care?" The younger Doctor said angrily.

"Aww, you're so annoying this young. I'd forgotten about just how much you hate yourself this time around." He walked up to the Doctor’s fifth incarnation and cupped his chin, bringing his gaze down to his. "Are you here willingly, I asked," he repeated.

"Yes!" the Doctor answered, pulling himself away from the older Master.

The Master looked at his younger self skeptically. The bearded man shrugged. "More or less," he admitted to his older self.

"Close enough, right Doctor?" The older Master asked the older Doctor.

"Oh all right. I still don't remember this happening, I'm telling you. It can't, because I don't, so none of this matters."

"Who says _I_ don't remember it happening. Maybe I retcon you afterwards or something." 

" _Do_ you remember?" his Doctor asked.

He shrugged a lot like his younger self had. "More or less," he said imitating his own voice.

"You're infuriating," both Doctors said at once.

The bearded Master laughed. "You were right. This is going to be quite amusing."

"And if the universe implodes, well, what a way to go!"

"Would you quit congratulating yourself on your cleverness," the blonde Doctor said.

"Yes, and what exactly is this bet you two have?" the other Doctor asked.

"It's quite simple," the younger Master said. "I say mine," he walked over and rested his hand on the blonde's shoulder, "can do more than yours." He smiled at his Doctor. "Youth, enthusiasm, and pent up repression."

"I'd forgotten how cute you were when you blushed then," the older Master said, looking at the younger Doctor.

"Hey now," the older Doctor said, walking over to his Master. "Let's not forget who belongs to whom here."

"He's rather possessive in the future," the younger Master said admiringly. 

"We get better with age," the older Master bragged.

"Well, how are you two going to manage this scheme?" the blonde Doctor asked.

"Yes, Master, as we already discussed… we're shallow. I'm not about to just let _anyone_ …" the older Doctor trailed off, embarrassedly realizing just what it was he was talking about doing.

"Don't worry. I told you I'm not about to watch some ugly old farts fucking. The proprietor of this establishment was kind enough to advertise the event for us and vet the applications." The Master looked smug with himselves. 

The blonde Doctor was looking increasingly nervous.

"Don't worry, my dear," the bearded Master said calmly. "We've arranged a comfortable room for the competition, very private."

"Yes, very private," the older Master said mockingly. "Just you and me and you and me and oh, fifty or so strangers with raging hard-ons looking for a cute little Time Lord arse to fuck."

"You're crass when you get older," the blonde said to the bearded man.

 

"Yeah," the older Master said, grabbing his Doctor and pulling him into a rough kiss. "Well you like it when _you_ get older. Upstairs, all of you." He smacked the blonde Doctor on the arse and grabbed his Doctor by the hand, dragging him up the rickety wooden back staircase.

The room was decently proportioned, but seemed smaller than it was for being dark and given what was about to happen there. Two mattresses were crudely thrown on the floor. Towels and lube were provided near each along with at pitcher of water. At the heads of the mattresses were comfortable chairs for each Master to sit and observe. 

"It's okay," the Doctor said reassuringly to his younger self. "You'll like it once you get over your shyness, I mean I will, so you will, so I did, I mean… on bloody hell."

That made the blonde Doctor laugh. "He always knows how to get to us, eh?" He looked quickly at his Master.

"That never changes," the older Doctor agreed, laughing along with himself. 

"So you two…"

"Spoilers," the older Doctor said and started to unbutton his suit jacket. He smiled at his Master who'd taken his place in his chair.

The Master grinned then looked at himself. "Yours is a little overdressed for the party still."

The bearded Master gave the blonde Doctor a bit of a glare. "Come now, Doctor. You said you'd be willing to try anything to dissuade me from my life of crime and atrocity. As you can see from my older self, you eventually succeed."

"Well," the older self said. "More or less."

The older doctor finished undressing and knelt before his Master. "More rather than less, right?"

"Oh very well. Yes. I'm a reformed man. There," he said looking at the blonde man. "Does that make you feel better?"

He looked skeptically at his older self. "You believe him?" he asked.

The Doctor looked over his shoulder and shrugged. "We have to, don't we?"

The blonde began to unbutton his cricket jacket. "I suppose we do."

"If you two have finished your hen party, I believe there are some rather handsome horny men on the other side of that door who'd like to make your acquaintance."

"You can't honestly find this as exciting as he does?" the younger Doctor asked his counterpart Master.

"Well, he is me after all," the bearded man said. "I have to admit, I am rather curious to see… Come kneel before me like you are with him," the Master said, not without tenderness in his voice.

The young Doctor blushed and did so. His Master leaned over and whispered in his ear. "You are beautiful, Doctor. Yes, I want to see you writhe on the floor and I want you to know that every man who has you is acting in my stead. I want to see you excite for him as you would for me. Don't deny it, Doctor. You know you never can deny me so let's do away with the pretense this time. Enjoy yourself. Take this night and release yourself from your inhibitions to do what it is you really want." The Master reached out and caressed the back of the Doctor's head, twining his fingers in his long blonde hair. "No one will know but us." He gently kissed the objections from the Doctor's lips. "Mine," he whispered against them.

The older Doctor was straining to hear what was being said to his younger self, but he was being distracted by the touch of his Master's fingers on his face. The look of raw lust in the Master's eyes turned him on. There was something so primal about his lover. No affectation of urbanity, just pure maddened desire. The Master was right, the crudity suited him now, his civility wiped clean by scourges of war and loss and age.

"I want your arse in the air, my little Theete," he said, grabbing a handful of the Doctor's hair and bending his head roughly back. "I want to watch those men fuck you and use you and I want to see you come." He claimed the Doctor's mouth in a bruising kiss, biting his perpetually pouting lower lip. He reached down and grasped the Doctor's cock. "Mine," he growled possessively.

The young Master went to the door and let the owner of the brothel in. On his way back to his chair, he let his hand trail reassuringly over the Doctor's blond head. "Very well, sir, you may start sending them in," he said to the other man. "And have one of your boys bring us some wine, if you have any vintage that's suitable to drink that is."

The older Doctor curled up in the center of his mattress. Despite his casual act in front of his younger self, he was quite nervous and looked back to the Master for reassurance. The lecherous grin was enough to embolden him. His younger self seemed to derive his strength from within himself and was steeling himself to 'endure' what was about to happen. The older Doctor remembered doing that often. How he'd have to deny his own desires behind noble self-sacrifice and the pretense of long-suffering. But he also remembered how easy that pretense crumbled once his passions began to rise. He was slower to enflame in that regeneration, but once begun he burned brightly. He might not remember it having happened, but he knew once it began he'd never forget. 

He began to worry about the madness of the impending paradox and how it would resolve, but a large muscular man knelt beside him. He smelled of the outdoors and hard labor but had cleaned himself as best he could given the primitive standards of the world, and the Doctor had to admit that he was a handsome chap. No, this would not be an onerous duty at all. He rolled onto his stomach and raised his arse in the air as the Master had said he wanted to see him that way. There was little in the way of foreplay or preparation as the man reached his fingers into the bowl of lube and shoved them roughly up the Doctor's arse. He gasped at the entry but had little time to adjust before he felt the man shove his hard prick deep inside, replacing his fingers with something larger. Thought was driven from his mind as his body sought to adjust to the invasion and he shifted and moved to find a way to bring pleasure from the pain. It was just beginning to feel good when the man finished with a hoarse grunt. The Doctor moaned in frustration but before he could even look over his shoulder a second man had entered him and began fucking with more skill than the first. Before long he was hard and panting. He looked over at his younger self.

The blonde Doctor was on his back, his legs pulled back almost to his shoulders. His eyes were squeezed tightly shut and if it weren't for his rampant cock one might think he was being tortured by the young man who was slowly fucking him. He didn't want to be enjoying this but his body had other ideas. Despite his youth, the man inside him knew exactly what he was doing, moving slowly in and out making each stroke tease the Doctor's prostate. In an amazing feat of flexibility the young man bent himself over and licked at the head of the Doctor's cock as he impaled him deeply. The Doctor's blue eyes opened wide and he watched with amazement as the man fucking him teased his cock with his mouth.

"I think yours is going to come first," the older Master said. "Won't last as long."

"Don't you remember though, that one night that we made him come four times?" the bearded man asked. "He has a young man's stamina. How old is yours? Twelve hundred? Fourteen?"

"Nine hundred and seven!" the Doctor said breathily.

The younger Doctor laughed raggedly. "Oh I see we lie about our age now, eh? Oh!" he screamed out when the young man, taking offense at his distractedness, angled his thrust to better get his attention. "Bloody hell!" he swore.

"No talking while I'm fucking you," the young man said. "I'm going to be the one make you come." He circled his hand around the Doctor's erection and before long had done just that.

The Doctor had no time to recover before his second man claimed him, though he was much less skilled and the Doctor was able to calm himself and settle into the less stimulating pace that was set.

"Mine's on his third already," the older Master bragged. He stretched out his legs and rested his foot on the edge of the mattress.

The Doctor noticed the Master's nearness and reached his hand up to touch the Master's shoe. He scooted a bit farther up until he could wrap his hand around the Master's ankle. The man fucking him followed his movement, not missing a beat. The touch was what the Doctor needed and knowing he had the Master's attention, he arched his back and thrust back against the man fucking him, more actively participating than he had before. It was his fourth who made him come though. He was resting his face against the Master's shoe and panting, quietly muttering something over and over again just under his breath. He reached beneath himself and stroked his cock as the man fucked him hard and fast until at last he came, screaming out the Master's true name.

The bearded man arched his eyebrow and looked at his older counterpart, not believing what he'd heard. The older Master looked smug as he moved his leg back, sitting up in his chair. "He screams for us again," he said quietly to his younger self. He leaned over conspiratorially and whispered. "It's worth it."

"Spoilers," the older Doctor chided. He rolled onto his back to give his knees a rest as the fifth man knelt down on his mattress. He looked at his younger self. "But yes," he said tenderly. "It _is_ worth it _all_."

Hours later, their younger selves had to concede the challenge, not because the blonde Doctor couldn't have gone one or two more, but because the young Master couldn't contain himself. He wrapped the naked and weak-kneed Doctor in his cloak and spirited him back to his TARDIS. Once inside, he lifted the taller man into his arms and carried him into the shower.

"I don't know what I'm like in the future, but I do not like sloppy seconds," he said as he gently washed his Doctor, following each swipe of the flannel with a kiss on his clean skin. He gathered the Doctor in his arms and they sat on the floor of the large shower, letting the warm water wash over their bodies. He brushed the Doctor's hair out of his face and kissed his lips. "You did that for me," he said, more than just a little awed.

"Yes," the Doctor answered, and rested his head on the Master's chest. They sat there under the warm water until their skin had become uncomfortably pruned. "You know we can't remember this," the Doctor said, sadly.

"We can wait until morning," the Master said, helping the Doctor to his feet and turning off the water.

"I suppose that won't hurt anything," the Doctor agreed. They dried one another with warm towels before heading to the Master's bedroom for the night. Before falling asleep, the Master carefully measured the dose of a potent form of retcon. When they woke together in the morning, they would simply assume they'd had another one of their 'truces' and each head their separate ways, none the wiser. 

The older Master, having won his bet, claimed his prize, roughly tossing the man, who had the audacity to still be fucking _his_ Doctor, aside. And though the Doctor was sore and tired and didn't think it possible to come yet another time, as he always could, his Master proved up to the challenge. For a second time that night the Doctor called out the Master's true name. 

"Come on, Doctor," the Master said, reaching his hand down to help his lover up off the filthy mattress. Neither of them bothered with their clothes as they made their way arm in arm down the back staircase to the TARDIS. "I think I like being your prisoner," the Master said.

"Oh, Koschei, you are not my prisoner."

"I know." The Master grinned. "No more isomorphic controls, remember?"

"Yes, well I'm taking away your texting privileges if you're going to act like an irresponsible teenager. You're lucky we didn't blow a hole in the universe."

"Luck had nothing to do with it, Theete. I always was better at temporal mechanics than you were."

The Doctor rolled his eyes. "Well don't do it again."

"Already been done, what would be the point? But I'm sure I'll think of something else..."

"Oh for Rassilon's sake!" The Doctor looked down, suddenly realizing he was naked and sticky and incredibly uncomfortable and cold on top of everything else. "I need a bath."

"Now that sounds like a good idea," the Master said, heading down the hallway.

"Oh god, Kosch, I am _so_ done," the Doctor said following after.

"Yeah, well I'm not," he leered. "Do you know how incredibly hot you looked? Both yous? I bet they're bopping like bunnies right now."

"I still don't remember," the Doctor said worriedly, starting the water filling the tub.

The Master settled into the huge bathtub with a sigh. "I told him to retcon the hell out of you before morning."

"What about you?" the Doctor asked, settling in beside his lover.

The Master shrugged. "Don't remember a thing. I must've dosed me too."

The Doctor looked skeptically at the Master. He supposed he'd never know for certain, but whatever the Master had done, the universe didn't implode, so it must've worked out all right in the end. He settled into the crook of the Master's arm and toed the tap off, enjoying the feel of the steamy water and the closeness of the other Time Lord.

"I do you know," he said.

"Yeah. I know." The Master rolled to his side and hugged the Doctor. "You luuuurrrrvvve me. You sop."

The Doctor slid, soapy and wet, along the Master's body and wrapped his arms around him. "Be nice or I won't go down on you when we get out of the bath."

"Now who would that punish more?"

"Bastard."

"Yep." He brushed the Doctor's wet hair out of his face. "Mine."

"Yes, Koschei."

**Author's Note:**

> Stop by and say hi on [tumbr](http://von--gelmini.tumblr.com).


End file.
